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  #751  
Old 08-15-2008, 10:02 PM
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RuthMayBond RuthMayBond is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tacosaregood/metsguy234 View Post
John Maine is so cool,
but he went on the DL,
and now he is back

Okay I have an AWESOME poem

John Maine is cool,
he is finished with school,
he is not a fool,
he would not eat gruel,
he does not drool,
he could sit on a stool,
he would win in a dool,
he'd never ride a mule,
he is not a tool,
he is really super-cool


I don't know if you
Met him, but it looks as if
He is your main man?
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Mythical SF Chronicle scouting report: "That Jeff runs like a deer. Unfortunately, he also hits AND throws like one." I am Venus DeMilo - NO ARM! I can play like a big leaguer, I can field like Luzinski, run like Lombardi. The secret to managing is keeping the ones who hate you away from the undecided ones. I am a triumph of quantity over quality. I'm almost useful, every village needs an idiot.
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  #752  
Old 09-25-2008, 01:19 AM
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108stitches 108stitches is offline
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Boston is red
The Cubbies are blue
The Tampa Bay Rays
Won't see round two.
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Washington? Good Grief!
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  #753  
Old 09-25-2008, 10:12 AM
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RuthMayBond RuthMayBond is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 108stitches View Post
Boston is red
The Cubbies are blue
The Tampa Bay Rays
Won't see round two.
Won't Tampa play
AL Central champion?
They don't seem that great.
__________________
Mythical SF Chronicle scouting report: "That Jeff runs like a deer. Unfortunately, he also hits AND throws like one." I am Venus DeMilo - NO ARM! I can play like a big leaguer, I can field like Luzinski, run like Lombardi. The secret to managing is keeping the ones who hate you away from the undecided ones. I am a triumph of quantity over quality. I'm almost useful, every village needs an idiot.
Good traders: MadHatter(2), BoofBonser26, StormSurge
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  #754  
Old 12-24-2008, 09:22 AM
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RuthMayBond RuthMayBond is offline
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That time of year again ...

On the twelve days of Christmas, my true love gave to me
Ted Williams humming
A Young-un' na-amed Cy-clone
Ten Georges Hermans
Nine (racist) Ansons
Eight Mays like Willie
Seven Mikes a Schmidt-ing
Six "geese" like Gossage
Five Lou Gehrigs
Ho-onus Wagner
Three Bench Johns
Two-oo Lefty Groves
And a Rogers who's na-amed Hornsby.
(this song includes at least one player in each position)
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Mythical SF Chronicle scouting report: "That Jeff runs like a deer. Unfortunately, he also hits AND throws like one." I am Venus DeMilo - NO ARM! I can play like a big leaguer, I can field like Luzinski, run like Lombardi. The secret to managing is keeping the ones who hate you away from the undecided ones. I am a triumph of quantity over quality. I'm almost useful, every village needs an idiot.
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  #755  
Old 01-09-2009, 07:57 AM
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Tenorman Tenorman is offline
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A haiku tribute to Roy Halladay...


Doc is on the mound
One by one the batters fall
Nine more in the books
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"He was something like zero for twenty-one the first time I saw him. His first major league hit was a home run off me and I'll never forgive myself. We might have gotten rid of Willie (Mays) forever if I'd only struck him out." - Warren Spahn
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  #756  
Old 01-29-2009, 11:49 AM
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RuthMayBond RuthMayBond is offline
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Thirteen stinkin' days,
Pitchers and catchers report,
There's hope after all?
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Mythical SF Chronicle scouting report: "That Jeff runs like a deer. Unfortunately, he also hits AND throws like one." I am Venus DeMilo - NO ARM! I can play like a big leaguer, I can field like Luzinski, run like Lombardi. The secret to managing is keeping the ones who hate you away from the undecided ones. I am a triumph of quantity over quality. I'm almost useful, every village needs an idiot.
Good traders: MadHatter(2), BoofBonser26, StormSurge
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  #757  
Old 01-29-2009, 12:36 PM
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Tyrus4189Cobb Tyrus4189Cobb is offline
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Location: The Moon
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From 1918 to 2004, we always said
That the Sox would win it next year. Who was to blame?
Slaughter dashed madly, in '86 Buckner was a goon
Dent hit a whopper, so did Aaron F@#%ing Boone
But finally, with the help of some Idiots, next year finally came.

Last edited by Tyrus4189Cobb; 01-29-2009 at 03:23 PM.
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  #758  
Old 01-29-2009, 01:19 PM
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RuthMayBond RuthMayBond is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tyrus4189Cobb View Post
From 1918 to 2004, we always said
That the Sox would win it next year. Who was to blame?
Slaughter dashed madly, in '86 Buckner was a goon
Dent hit a whopper, so did Aaron F@#%ing Boone
But finally, with the help of some Idiots, next year finally came.
Annie will have to confirm if this is both limeric AND iambic pentameter

From '18 to '04, we always claimed
The Sox would win next year. Who was to blame?
First, Slaughter dashed, then Buckner was a goon.
Dent hit one out, then Aaron F@#%ing Boone
But with our Idiots, next year had came.
__________________
Mythical SF Chronicle scouting report: "That Jeff runs like a deer. Unfortunately, he also hits AND throws like one." I am Venus DeMilo - NO ARM! I can play like a big leaguer, I can field like Luzinski, run like Lombardi. The secret to managing is keeping the ones who hate you away from the undecided ones. I am a triumph of quantity over quality. I'm almost useful, every village needs an idiot.
Good traders: MadHatter(2), BoofBonser26, StormSurge
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  #759  
Old 01-29-2009, 03:52 PM
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Tyrus4189Cobb Tyrus4189Cobb is offline
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What happened I don't recall
Or why Beltran helped me at all
I was perfectly fine all alone
Dashing for the wild catch on the ball
Instead there was a brawl

We tossed and we tumbled
And we turned and we fumbled
The fans yelled in fright
But Beltran came out alright
As long as he's ok, who the f@&# cares how I am?
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  #760  
Old 02-03-2009, 12:20 PM
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RuthMayBond RuthMayBond is offline
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Location: northeast Ohio
Posts: 23,420
Saw boys playing catch
In lot surrounded by snow;
Gen X worries left.
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Mythical SF Chronicle scouting report: "That Jeff runs like a deer. Unfortunately, he also hits AND throws like one." I am Venus DeMilo - NO ARM! I can play like a big leaguer, I can field like Luzinski, run like Lombardi. The secret to managing is keeping the ones who hate you away from the undecided ones. I am a triumph of quantity over quality. I'm almost useful, every village needs an idiot.
Good traders: MadHatter(2), BoofBonser26, StormSurge
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  #761  
Old 02-03-2009, 12:54 PM
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Tyrus4189Cobb Tyrus4189Cobb is offline
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Location: The Moon
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In 1919, life in Chicago was swell
The Sox had the best record
They had all done well.
Every fan roared,
"The Sox win the pennant!"
The city had soared
From 25 guys who knew what it meant
To play ball.

But one day, however, to the utmost unfortunicity,
Eight guys did something
That would plague the city
And Blacken their socks.

Cicotte saw lotte,
Felsch wanted wealth,
Gandil lead the scandal,
McMullin was sullen,
Greed swayed Swede,
Weaver was a cheater,
Lefty lost thrice,
Now that isn't nice.

But Chicago's most beloved player of all
Was corrupt and lead to downfall.
Shoeless Joe may be great,
But he was part of the eight
That forever scarred baseball.
Maybe Shoeless was innocent
From such a nasty predicament,
If you wish to learn this,
Then go ask Bill Burgess.

But now it is done.
Landis made sure
That each and every one
Was banished for life as part of the cure.
Sorry Chicago, that's how it's been,
Maybe some football will be best
To lessen the burden
Put your weary fan-hearts to rest.
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  #762  
Old 02-03-2009, 12:58 PM
RuthMayBond's Avatar
RuthMayBond RuthMayBond is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tyrus4189Cobb View Post
In 1919, life in Chicago was swell
The Sox had the best record
They had all done well.
Every fan roared,
"The Sox win the pennant!"
The city had soared
From 25 guys who knew what it meant
To play ball.

But one day, however, to the utmost unfortunicity,
Eight guys did something
That would plague the city
And Blacken their socks.

Cicotte saw lotte,
Felsch wanted wealth,
Gandil lead the scandal,
McMullin was sullen,
Greed swayed Swede,
Weaver was a cheater,
Lefty lost thrice,
Now that isn't nice.

But Chicago's most beloved player of all
Was corrupt and lead to downfall.
Shoeless Joe may be great,
But he was part of the eight
That forever scarred baseball.
Maybe Shoeless was innocent
From such a nasty predicament,
If you wish to learn this,
Then go ask Bill Burgess.

But now it is done.
Landis made sure
That each and every one
Was banished for life as part of the cure.
Sorry Chicago, that's how it's been,
Maybe some football will be best
To lessen the burden
Put your weary fan-hearts to rest.
Dang, yer blowin' us away
__________________
Mythical SF Chronicle scouting report: "That Jeff runs like a deer. Unfortunately, he also hits AND throws like one." I am Venus DeMilo - NO ARM! I can play like a big leaguer, I can field like Luzinski, run like Lombardi. The secret to managing is keeping the ones who hate you away from the undecided ones. I am a triumph of quantity over quality. I'm almost useful, every village needs an idiot.
Good traders: MadHatter(2), BoofBonser26, StormSurge
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  #763  
Old 02-04-2009, 12:33 PM
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Tyrus4189Cobb Tyrus4189Cobb is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by RuthMayBond View Post
Dang, yer blowin' us away
Thanks man. When I wrote it I liked it a lot and figured others would too. My favorite line is "Cicotte saw lotte." The "see" and the "saw" in the sentence worked out into a nice little pun-like thingamajig.
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  #764  
Old 02-04-2009, 02:43 PM
Bill Burgess Bill Burgess is online now
Power Users
 
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Location: Mt. View, CA, above San Jose
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tyrus4189Cobb View Post
If you wish to learn this,
Then go ask Bill Burgess.
I am honored.
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  #765  
Old 02-04-2009, 09:09 PM
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DownUnderDodger DownUnderDodger is offline
Learning all the time.
 
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: Central Coast, NSW, Australia
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Manny wants to sign,
But interest is benign
Four years is his aim,
To stay in the game.
Two was an offer,
Big money in his coffers.
No thanks, too short,
Said Boras, his cohort.
There was a counter of one,
But no deal has been done.
"It is not about the money",
Which sounds a little funny,
Coming from a player
Who seeks the highest payer.
For whom will he play,
For his next pay day?
But soon we will know,
Where Manny will go.
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  #766  
Old 02-09-2009, 10:57 AM
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RuthMayBond RuthMayBond is offline
Out in LF (Kingman of BBF
 
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: northeast Ohio
Posts: 23,420
Might not go batty.
Equipment trucks heading south.
Hope to have a ball.
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Mythical SF Chronicle scouting report: "That Jeff runs like a deer. Unfortunately, he also hits AND throws like one." I am Venus DeMilo - NO ARM! I can play like a big leaguer, I can field like Luzinski, run like Lombardi. The secret to managing is keeping the ones who hate you away from the undecided ones. I am a triumph of quantity over quality. I'm almost useful, every village needs an idiot.
Good traders: MadHatter(2), BoofBonser26, StormSurge
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  #767  
Old 03-31-2009, 11:47 AM
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RuthMayBond RuthMayBond is offline
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Location: northeast Ohio
Posts: 23,420
Season starts so soon.
Close seats will be weird for me.
I'll make sacrifice
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Mythical SF Chronicle scouting report: "That Jeff runs like a deer. Unfortunately, he also hits AND throws like one." I am Venus DeMilo - NO ARM! I can play like a big leaguer, I can field like Luzinski, run like Lombardi. The secret to managing is keeping the ones who hate you away from the undecided ones. I am a triumph of quantity over quality. I'm almost useful, every village needs an idiot.
Good traders: MadHatter(2), BoofBonser26, StormSurge

Last edited by RuthMayBond; 05-11-2009 at 11:05 AM.
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  #768  
Old 04-01-2009, 05:21 PM
soxfan34 soxfan34 is offline
Saving sandlot forever
 
Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: Boston
Posts: 75
this is not mine but i founf it at ryanparkersongs.com
A-Rod wants more money but does this come as a surprise?
He's got pockets deep as oceans and big dollar signs for eyes,
He claims a measly salary of 25 mil,
Can't protect him from inflation and a weaker dollar bill,

So Scott Boras wants the Yankees to begin a bidding war,
Cause it's not enough to make only 70 times more,
Than the next president be it Hillary or Rudy,
He's going to break the bank because that's an agent's duty,

A-Rod wants more money than a wealthy Kennedy,
Enough to feed Latrell Sprewell's family,
He wants more dollars than the richest Rockefeller,
And checks to cash that will shock the bank teller,
He wants a house bigger than a Vanderbilt,
But I don't understand how he doesn't feel some guilt,
Cause his playoff chokes have been ever so revealing,
When he signs another contract I say he's Been Caught Stealing,

The 50,000 dollars A-Rod gets for one at bat,
Could buy 30 suits of armor for our soldiers in Iraq,
And the half a million bucks that he gets for each home run,
Could pay 10 teachers salaries in full and then some,

Just so the next 50 A-Rod generations aren't hurting,
He wants to outearn the CEO of Halliburton,
It seems a little greedy once you acquire the knowledge,
That his yearly salary could put 600 kids through college,

A-Rod wants more money than a wealthy Kennedy,
Enough to feed Latrell Sprewell's family,
He wants more dollars than the richest Rockefeller,
And checks to cash that will shock the bank teller,
He wants a house bigger than a Vanderbilt,
But I don't understand how he doesn't feel some guilt,
Cause his playoff chokes have been ever so revealing,
When he signs another contract I say,
They must have been watching him play,
Only in April and May,
He's Been Caught Stealing ...
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  #769  
Old 04-03-2009, 07:10 PM
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VTSoxFan VTSoxFan is offline
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Long winter's over
cannot wait to hear the ump
shout the words "Play Ball!"
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ABNY
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  #770  
Old 05-11-2009, 11:02 AM
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RuthMayBond RuthMayBond is offline
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We hit, but can't pitch.
Pitch but can't hit. Called vacuum
For *diff'rent* reason
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Mythical SF Chronicle scouting report: "That Jeff runs like a deer. Unfortunately, he also hits AND throws like one." I am Venus DeMilo - NO ARM! I can play like a big leaguer, I can field like Luzinski, run like Lombardi. The secret to managing is keeping the ones who hate you away from the undecided ones. I am a triumph of quantity over quality. I'm almost useful, every village needs an idiot.
Good traders: MadHatter(2), BoofBonser26, StormSurge
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  #771  
Old 05-11-2009, 11:37 PM
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Rockhound Rockhound is offline
There's no base like home
 
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Location: Albuquerque, New Mexico
Posts: 991
Baseball season back again,
turning boys into men.
Fresh cut grass and mustard stains,
eager fans don't mind the rains.
Autographed pictures, scorecards too,
baseball cards and gum to chew.
Sandlot games on the 4th of July,
from Denver, Colorado to Brooklyn, NY.
America's pasttime is alive and well,
if there's no baseball in heaven, send me to hell.
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  #772  
Old 05-12-2009, 07:43 AM
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RuthMayBond RuthMayBond is offline
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Location: northeast Ohio
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Rockhound View Post
if there's no baseball in heaven, send me to hell.
Baseball in heaven? I would guess.
You can always play, don't need to rest.
To the other place you might not wanna jump,
I've heard that *they* have all the umps.
__________________
Mythical SF Chronicle scouting report: "That Jeff runs like a deer. Unfortunately, he also hits AND throws like one." I am Venus DeMilo - NO ARM! I can play like a big leaguer, I can field like Luzinski, run like Lombardi. The secret to managing is keeping the ones who hate you away from the undecided ones. I am a triumph of quantity over quality. I'm almost useful, every village needs an idiot.
Good traders: MadHatter(2), BoofBonser26, StormSurge
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  #773  
Old 08-10-2009, 08:01 AM
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Tyrus4189Cobb Tyrus4189Cobb is offline
King of the Ring
 
Join Date: May 2007
Location: The Moon
Posts: 1,342
When baseball was king,
Players sprinted to first,
Being safe was everything,
Satisfied like thirst.

Once every few days
Pitchers were back on the mound,
For completion he stays,
What is a pitch count?

They played for the joy
Of being kids on a diamond,
Not for money or fame,
It was a different timing.

Now its an era that pays
For the asterisk swing,
Oh, how I miss the days
When baseball was king.
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  #774  
Old 11-03-2009, 10:41 AM
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RuthMayBond RuthMayBond is offline
Out in LF (Kingman of BBF
 
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: northeast Ohio
Posts: 23,420
No surprises here -
Yank buy the best free agents,
My team sucks AGAIN!
__________________
Mythical SF Chronicle scouting report: "That Jeff runs like a deer. Unfortunately, he also hits AND throws like one." I am Venus DeMilo - NO ARM! I can play like a big leaguer, I can field like Luzinski, run like Lombardi. The secret to managing is keeping the ones who hate you away from the undecided ones. I am a triumph of quantity over quality. I'm almost useful, every village needs an idiot.
Good traders: MadHatter(2), BoofBonser26, StormSurge
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