My Little League Nightmare

[Roothog66]

Our team had to select three kids for All State for travel. I called our other coach, we looked at the books, and picked the kids with the best stats for the tournament. Simple as that. My kid wasn't one of them, fwiw.

The other coach is on the board of our rec league. They had to select all-stars this week. Numerous coaches wouldn't select certain kids because they didn't like the opposing coach. Two of the best players didn't make it, because their team went undefeated and this was the other coaches way of getting back at that team. People wonder why rec leagues are dying? The best part is that when these two kids are playing travel full time next year, the league will still be blaming travel for killing their leagues.

True. We hear so much about how travel ball is killing rec ball, but many ignore the fact that travel ball, for some, is a haven from the crazy politics of youth leagues.

[jbolt_2000]

One irony in all of this is that two teams of kids came to LL from Dixie in the fall. They made the switch specifically to go to the Little League World Series. They certainly will win district and could have a shot at winning state. Anything beyond that is anyone's guess. Our LL Division hasn't even won district in about 15 years. So this is a big deal, and these people are being treated like royalty right now.

I can't imagine, with all that you've described about the other coaches, that your Little League will win districts with a shot at winning state. Two stud players can only compensate for horrible coaching so much.

One thing I haven't been able to grasp is whether the kids get enough recognition. When they play rec ball, they get a lot of recognition by being so much better than some of the inexperienced players. They are picked for all stars and so forth. That doesn't really happen in travel ball. The awards are team-oriented. So I've tried to explain to him that his team is sort of like an all star team and that it's a privilege to play at that level. I think he gets it. We're going to do a few more seasons of rec ball. He hasn't been on an all star team because he was too young in LL. I want him to have that experience. Then we'll evaluate and decide whether to go to travel ball full time or mix the two.

With all that you've said, how could you even have a single thought of going back to this league? 5 out of 7 seasons were horrible by your description, yet you want to go back?
Even if you went back, it sounds like your kid will be shunned from All-Stars because of how the other coaches feel about you. The only chance your kid has of making the A.S. team is if you are coach, even if he is the best player in the league - at least that is how it sounds.

Also, A.S. is a good experience - but it will not make or break your child's baseball experience. I don't think your son will be 25 years old thinking about how you forced him to switch leagues and he hates you now for never giving him the chance to play All-stars. Nor will it affect any decisions by high school or colleges as to determining whether your son is chosen to play on their teams.

Before long, our coach is shouting, and the opposing coach is standing around shortstop approaching the mound. Both guys are talking smack, "You wanna go. Let's Go!" It was that kind of stuff. I was very upset to see a coach acting like that. But it was our last game.

Something similar happened in our league a few years ago. No physical contact, but alot of yelling and threats like above. Thanks to the BOD - The coach did not step foot on our field again. If he had, I probably wouldn't have returned (along with several other coaches/families)

Last summer, I met with a few parents and formed an informal committee. A few people caught wind of this via Facebook, and they spread a rumor that we were trying to get a local government grant. While that was something on our minds, it wasn't our purpose. We just wanted to have better facilities.

While your intentions were good - it comes off as forming a coup to overthrow the current board of directors who I'm sure feel are doing a fantastic job (rose colored glasses and all).

So here we were at the start of Season 6. My son was moving up to Minors. And there were two coaches already in Minors. We only had enough kids for two teams. So I bit my lip and my son played for the notorious coach again. Two other kids from my championship coach-pitch team also were picked to play for this coach. And the guy was absolutely terrible. He screamed at his son and yelled at other kids. He didn't know the rules. One of my favorite kids scored but didn't slide. The ump called him out. The catcher was in front of the plate still catching the ball when he crossed. Instead of arguing the call, the coach screamed at this kid, and the kid came back to the dugout in tears.

Should not be coaching.... Any BOD that supports this type of coach would not see me or my family any ever again.

So my assistant coach throws a fit and tells me he's going to take his two sons (brothers, of course) off the team. I told him that I didn't think he should punish them because he disagrees with me. So he kept going on, and I asked him to leave the field.

I would have stopped the game, told the guy to take his players as he threatened and to leave the field. You are the Manager you should have control of your team, not be held hostage by horrible parents with good players.

I said something back, and he said, "If you say another word to me, I'm going to knock you out." So, my own coach is saying this. I had no idea what to do. I called time and talked to the home plate umpire, who was our league president. He refused to make the guy leave and said it was my problem. So I had to coach the rest of the game with this guy standing there by my dugout.

I don't know what you said to the coach, but if it made him feel like he wanted to hit you, then it probably wasn't good on your part to say.
But again, if my assistant said anything of the sort I would have stopped the game and not played until he left, with or without his sons.

During the same game, the notorious coach yelled at his son, saying, "Son, if you think you're scared of the ball, how about if I hit you with a bat if you back out of the box again?" One of my own parents hollered from the bleachers over that one.

I would be pretty tempted to make a comment like, "If you hit your son with a bat, I will call the cops."
Then make an official complaint to the BOD - if he returned to coach the next year I would not.
Unbelievable that the President / Umpire would let that go on in a game.

He was our best pitcher, or so I thought. But he couldn't throw strikes and had been told by dad not to listen to my instruction.

Then you tell him and the dad that if they continue to undermine you as head coach then you will not play them at pitcher/SS/whatever else the "star" player plays. If they take him off the team, so be it.

So, now it's closing ceremony day, I arrived at the field to find that three of my players had played in a game for the notorious coach. I inquired and found out that he and the other Minors coach organized a scrimmage and invited some of my players but didn't invite my son, who was one of the premier players in the division and also didn't invite me to coach or two watch. The other two Minors coaches both were involved in this scrimmage. I said something to one of them, and they brushed it off like it was no big deal.

Whats the point of this scrimmage? Prepare for All Stars? Testing out for a Travel Ball team? Or just wanted to play some games with players they wanted?
I wouldn't put too much thought into it. And clearly they didn't want your son because they don't like you. Take as a sign to leave the league.

Naturally, he picked the notorious coach to be his assistant. Then they overlooked me for the other assistant coach spot and picked someone else. In fact, they never even told me a thing about all stars.

Are you surprised? I would be surprised if they did call you! Clearly they didn't like you or you like them, so why would they want that dynamic on the team?
I had the opportunity a couple years ago to pick up the best player in our league This kid was awesome. But I elected not to because his Dad was a PITA! I would rather have a pleasant, fun, stress free, losing season, then have a winning season with a Dad complaining or questioning my every move or gossiping to other parents, etc... By the way, we still had a winning season.

My son is too young to play. So that was a moot point.

I've coached All-Stars several years and I will always choose a parent whose child is on the team over a parent/coach whose child is not on the team. If I have the opportunity to choose 2-3 assistants and one really wanted to help coach but didn't have a child playing, then I might do it. But I always felt that a parent with a kid on the team would get more out of coaching All-Stars with their child than a parent/coach with no kid on the team.

Anyway, I decided before the end of the season to switch to the other league. But I blew my top a little with some Facebook posts about how these two coaches treated me, and it resulted in one of the coaches and his wife starting a stupid little Facebook war with me. I'll be the first to admit that I was stupid in letting my emotions get to me.

Bad move. You should have just left and not speak of it to anyone except close friends who felt the same. But hey, we live and learn.

But I felt like I was disrespected and mistreated and that they even rubbed my nose in it to be spiteful and ganged up against me like a couple of middle school bullies.

And you want to go back this year, just so your son has a chance play All-Stars - which by all accounts sounds like he won't be selected because they don't like you.

I just sort of grinned on opening day and pretended I didn't know how all of the improvements came about.

Its good to be humble, but politics also play a big part. If you want to get rid of the bad apples in a league you have to show who is making the positive changes. Don't have to get on a soap box and brag to everyone who will listen. But subtle hints and having positive conversations, to those that ask, about how you helped tend to go a long way.

Since the end of the regular season, my son has joined a travel ball team. I feared that he wouldn't enjoy it as much because of the higher talent level and movement away from his close friends. But it turns out that he still stands out and has a better rapport with the other talented players than with some of the kids from our trashy rec ball league.

While this was taking place, our new league president was doing a terrible job. He yelled at me multiple times for things that seemed ridiculous.

But he screamed at me about it. He did this numerous times, too. And he screamed at my friend, whose son played for me for three seasons. She was on the board, too, and volunteered to be concession manager. He made her so mad that she resigned and ended up pulling our most talented 8-year-old out of the league at the end of the season.

The new president of the league was so disorganized, incompetent and deceitful that he drove the league into the ground over the winter.

Then, he and his wife botched uniforms and opening day ceremonies. The ceremony was not held for the first time in decades, and kids were forced to change into uniforms at the parade line-up. We didn't have hats or belts.

What irked me most this spring is that the president decided to give a guy who had never managed a manager spot over me.

We had enough kids for three teams. But the president and VP shuffled kids around to other divisions and left me out in the cold. Notorious coach and this inexperienced guy both were given teams. I felt disrespected.

And these people acted like I didn't even exist.

He and the other Minors coach decided to gang up on me.

But these guys were out to get me.

I felt all alone like the uncool high school kid.

The president strong-armed everything and never let anyone get involved in planning, organizing and implementing stuff. He also ignored advice and suggestions.

And you want to go back to this league just for a chance at All Stars???


I got to be honest - I see a lot of talk about how all these coaches and board members are horrible and team up against YOU. You cite several scenarios where they gang up on you or purposely leave you out of things. Either these are the most petty, immature, ignorant people I have ever heard of (which can very well be the case), or there is more to the story and maybe there is something that you've done to make them feel this way.

I would be hard-pressed not to look in the mirror and say, "what did I do to make them all hate me this much and treat me this way?"

I'm not saying its all your fault as I definitely do not have the whole story, but I bet if we asked these other coaches they would see it in a different light as well.


Lastly, I'll finish up with a reoccurring message:
And you want to go back?!?!?!?!

[Roothog66]

Run, don't walk away from this. Embrace the TB experience where you don't ahve to deal with the politics. When the people running the league are good, it's a great experience, but that doesn't seem to be YOUR experience. LLWS? Please. If you're talking about a league with a history of doing that, then you've got something (but, then again, organizations with that kind of history don't have the problems you're describing). TB is the All-Star experience every weekend. Come to the darkside, Luke.

[HeinekenMan]

[QUOTE=jbolt_2000;2027591]I can't imagine, with all that you've described about the other coaches, that your Little League will win districts with a shot at winning state. Two stud players can only compensate for horrible coaching so much.

RESPONSE: There are two rec leagues in town. The coaches with a shot at state came over from the other league last year and are relatively good coaches. They coach a division higher than the horrible coaches I mentioned. These two coaches brought over about 10-15 kids and most of that group also plays travel ball. Their two teams went unbeaten during the season and in Tournament of Champions except for one beating the other. And the scores typically weren't close. I believe they have some kids who can throw hard and have several kids who hit out-of-the-park homers on a regular basis.

I wrote a lot, and it's confusing, I'm sure. The Dixie league is the league where he'll be able to play all stars. He's going from LL to Dixie-Travel.

I thought it was shocking that they didn't take any steps against that coach after he threatened to fight an opposing coach. The fact that he was allowed to continue coaching should have been a sign of how poorly the league is run. My wife told me to switch to Dixie after every season, but I kept saying that I wanted to give it one more chance.

I agree that some people felt that we were starting a coup. It turns out that there was a lot of in-fighting already taking place and most of the board members had quit attending meetings. Part of the problem was that they were paying umpires out of pre-tax concession dollars and weren't issuing 1099s when necessary. This amounted to tax evasion and possibly other crimes. When it was brought up, there was a fight between board members. I didn't find out about it until three months into my tenure, and I quickly questioned why it was still happening.

I think what I said to the assistant coach was something like "I'm trying to coach a game. I don't need this "S**T"! He isn't a great person nor a great parent, from what I've seen. One of his sons will be a 10-year-old in third grade this fall. The kid is as bright as any kid I've coached, but I don't think he knows how to read. They came to the house to play in the yard with my boy one day, and I found out neither of the boys has a bicycle. I am debating whether to leave my son's bike on their porch this weekend. The kid's 10th birthday is Saturday. And my boy has mostly outgrown his bike.

I'm not sure what the scrimmage was about. The picked two kids from my team who aren't eligible for all stars. I think they just wanted to beat a team from another city that had gone undefeated during the season.

You're probably right about choosing an assistant coach with a parent on the team. I heard that they chose my assistant coach. But I haven't been able to verify that. FWIW, I told the wife I was going to decline anyway. I just didn't expect them to pass me over. I at least expected to be asked for advice on my players' abilities. I thought there might be a tryout or a nomination process. Apparently, our league isn't that organized.

I am sure there is something that these 3-4 people do not like. Maybe they think I'm cocky and/or arrogant. Perhaps I am. If so, it's inadvertent. To be frank, I think they feel inferior. They are good ol' boys who drive trucks and work as mechanics. I am a newspaper reporter. Their wives are stay-at-home moms. My wife is a popular teacher at a local school. My son is a better player than their kids. And my team has beaten their teams for the past 2-3 seasons. That doesn't make me a better individual. But maybe they resent me or think I boast or something. I'm just guessing.

Most importantly, I think they resent that I'm well-liked by kids and parents. Meanwhile, the one coach usually only has 2-3 kids from his team who return to the league for another season. I think they realized that all of these kids wanted me as their coach, and i think that made them feel even worse. And I guess that turned into anger.

EDIT: During practice today, I realized one of my biggest faults. I talk too much, write too much and often end up saying a few things that I shouldn't have said. That's one of my bigger faults. Just like the above message. I probably had some eyes rolling by saying that I think they might feel inferior. Some things are better left unsaid. And I say them. Almost always. And that definitely is one of my faults. And maybe I said some things that, when passed from person to person, left people with the wrong impression.

[CircleChange11]

True. We hear so much about how travel ball is killing rec ball, but many ignore the fact that travel ball, for some, is a haven from the crazy politics of youth leagues.

That would be my experience/perception.

I'm often introduced to the idea that "going TB" will ruin one's reputation in town ... to which my new response is going to be "as opposed to being on a youth baseball board where the board decides one thing and everyone goes about doing their own thing, which is in direct opposition of the board's decision ... with no consequences?"

Unfortunately, youth sports boards being manipulated for one team or one age group, is very common.

It's distasteful IMO. The public has very little knowledge of what goes on behind the scenes. The view of kids as property of how each team/league can exploit the kids to their own benefit is disheartening.

Quite frankly, I'm tired of our age group's TB team getting screwed because we have integrity and will comply with the board's decisions (even when they go against us), while the other age's TB teams pretty much do what they want. I'm seeing how the upcoming board discussions go (they're wanting to come up with full rules to govern TB, including managing all of the money) before I share details with the forum on some of the unbelievable horsepoop that has gone on over the past 2 years.

Evidently, becoming a board member is more about how you can use the league to your own team/kid/league's benefit rather than building a strong program.

I truly believe "baseball mafia" is a very accurate description.

[HeinekenMan]

That would be my experience/perception.

I'm often introduced to the idea that "going TB" will ruin one's reputation in town ... to which my new response is going to be "as opposed to being on a youth baseball board where the board decides one thing and everyone goes about doing their own thing, which is in direct opposition of the board's decision ... with no consequences?"

Yes. I have seen this, too, of course. In fact, I have mentioned the two travel teams that moved over to Little League last fall with the express purpose of vying for a state title and, perhaps, a trip to the LLWS. That group is composed of kids who finished as state runner-up last year in the Dixie program.

When those two coaches came to Little League, I knew there would be violations of draft rules. I assumed they would be able to draft all of their kids who moved over from Dixie. And I was correct. We had four teams. Their two teams had 4-5 players per team who were probably more desirable draft picks than anyone on the other two teams. So I am wondering how the other two managers did not draft any of those 8-10 kids.

Of course, the result if this is that the two teams clobbered the two lesser teams and all of the interleague teams, too, in meaningless regular season play. That also did not benefit those star players because they never were challenged. Instead of having Slugger A bat against Stud Pitcher A, it was Slugger A getting a home run on a single to right field against some poor kid whose team lost 25-0.

[mr. potato head]

New baseball dad finds out that youth baseball is not really about the kids, but rather how certain adults will manipulate things for their own edification, egos, and sometimes profit.

Tries to make a change, but realizes that like with all political agendas, one person can only alter the coarse of the Titanic enough delay hitting the iceberg, but without either grabbing the wheel as the Captain, or getting the engine crew to revolt with him, he's only delaying the inevitable.

In movie theaters this September.....still waiting on seeing if the the league was one of open "ballpark tawdry and infidelity" between some of the parents, or whether they were able to keep their escapades behind closed doors, so the appropriate "R" or "PG" rating can be assigned to it.

Stay tuned, more details soon to follow.

Thank you, I will look forward to Chapter II and the uncut "adult" version on showtime after hours!

[HeinekenMan]

I have one more tale to share with you about this season. This was one of the better moments. I was able to draft a player who had played for the angry coach last fall. He is the nicest kid in the world. He loves to tell jokes, never cusses, never complains or talks back to the coach, hustles more than any kid on the team, etc. When it's time to pick up balls behind home plate or in the field, this kid runs after them. I wish every kid was like this kid.

But this kid had only played two seasons of coach-pitch ball for me. When he started, he didn't know how to bat, couldn't catch the ball, didn't know how to run the bases, etc. He also is Mexican and English is his second language. He speaks it well enough, but he had a little trouble with some of the baseball terminology. I quickly taught him to bat. Because he is a huge kid. He hit some homers for my team. It took a lot of patience to get him to field grounders. He said he wanted to be a catcher, so I taught him the position. And he became my regular catcher.

But he was on the angry coach's kid-pitch team in the fall. And that dude had no patience. He grew to hate this little kid. I could tell that the kid frustrated him. One day, the kid scored, stepped on home plate and was called out by an ump who didn't know the rules. He had avoided the catcher, who was in front of the plate still waiting for the ball, which he caught a full second after the kid scored.

But the angry coach screamed at this kid right in his face as he came back to the dugout. And the kid was in tears. I had given him a ride to the game, and I took him home. I sent a message to his parents explaining what had happened. They said they wondered what might have happened because the kid came home and immediately said he wanted to quit baseball.

This spring, I drafted that kid onto my team. He has some kind of power in his bat. And I was ready to take him to the next level. He is 9, and I think he can clear the 200-foot fence if he learns how to load and stop lunging at the ball.

When I drafted this kid, the angry coach laughed loudly and said, "you can have him. That kid drives me nuts." I told him that the kid was a star on my team and that we would show him.

Well, the first time we played the angry coach, I walked up from third base and whispered in the kid's ear. I told him to remember what that coach had done to him. He hated that coach. I knew that. We had discussed it. So he walked to the plate and slammed the first good pitch over the left-fielder's head. The kid is a little slow. He settled for a triple. When he pulled into third base, he had a huge, huge smile on his face. We celebrated. He was so satisfied. And that is how you get back at a big bully baseball coach, my friends.

[HeinekenMan]

Well, our 9-10 all stars are finished. I quietly watched the team play Friday and today (Sunday). But the coaches wouldn't speak to me, and their spouses glared at me a few times. One even muttered some nasty stuff under her breath in an attempt to start another confrontation and then walked 15 feet away and started flapping her jaws about me like some teenage girl trying to start a fight. I mostly stayed away from them.

After squeaking out a win on Wednesday, they lost 17-4 on Friday and 16-8 today (Sunday) to complete their tournament run.

In today's game, the team was winning 8-5 when the manager pulled the pitcher and put in a kid from his own league team. The poor kid got shelled and gave up about 10 runs before they got out of the inning. Most of it was the result of errors. It happens. The thing is that I got a call after the game from a dad I don't even know. He was ticked off because the manager was yelling at the kids in the dugout and was throwing "things". A mom also called me to complain, and i got a Facebook message from another mom, who was mad about the yelling and other things. I don't need any further drama. So I just sort of listened and said that I'd be willing to work with their kids in the future.

Late in today's game, my former assistant coach from the spring season (the guy who threatened to punch me during a game) was ejected for arguing balls and strikes. The umpire gave the three coaches a warning before the ejection. All three were barking at him over called third strikes in two straight innings. I never saw the coaches from the other team conduct themselves that way. It was embarrassing, and it seems like our league has a reputation for that sort of thing. After my old assistant was booted, he kept jawing and the umpire threatened to call the police. So he left the bleachers to puff on his smokes.

I didn't go near the players during the first loss. But I saw a kid strike out three times, and he's close to hitting. He just doesn't keep his hands inside and has too much movement with his stride and swing. His mom sent me a message last night to ask about getting him some extra help. I agreed to work with him before the game, but we didn't have a lot of time. So I just hollered for him to meet me outside of the fence for a second while the coaches were wrapping up preparations. I talked to him for about 10 seconds, and the manager, who had been out on the field, walked over to the gate and cut me off in mid-sentence to tell him to get back on the field. Then he shut the gate right in front of me without saying a word.

It's frustrating to have been the target of such nastiness and disrespect. But what's even more disappointing is thinking about those poor kids having a great experience spoiled by a bunch of idiots who are more concerned about themselves than the kids they're trying to mentor. And I think they truly thought I was there to watch them fail. Maybe that's how they would have responded. But I was there to cheer for those boys. I've known some of those kids for half of their lives. I was there to support them. In the fall, I'm going to take as many of them as I can to the other league to teach those morons a lesson. They'll be lucky to have one Minor Division team next year. They might need to plant crops on one of the fields to break even.

[HeinekenMan]

I'm not even sure that anyone is still reading. But here goes. I emailed the league that we're moving to. I got a call tonight from the league president. He understands what's up with me moving, and he said there have been several coaches who did the same in the past.

He thinks there's a good chance I'll have a manager spot if I'm bringing the equivalent of a whole team to their league. Even if I only bring a few, there's still an opportunity for me to manage. Right now, I have four kids who are definitely moving and possibly 5-10 more who are still debating what to do. They'll only let a team keep four protects. They'll also let a new manager have first draft pick. So I get my five best kids. I'm really excited. I have an opportunity to build around five really fine ballplayers, and these are kids with great parents. This means we'll have a great time and also be competitive.

I guess I have just one question. I'm a really honest guy. Sometimes to a fault. I'll have 2-3 kids in the draft who aren't very talented but are "my" kids. I've coached them 3-4 seasons. Since I can't protect them, I should I let the other coaches know that I'd like to have them and hope they're understanding? I'm not sure I can tell a kid to skip or bomb an evaluation/tryout. But I know that's how some other coaches get around that sort of thing.

[jbolt_2000]

I didn't go near the players during the first loss. But I saw a kid strike out three times, and he's close to hitting. He just doesn't keep his hands inside and has too much movement with his stride and swing. His mom sent me a message last night to ask about getting him some extra help. I agreed to work with him before the game, but we didn't have a lot of time. So I just hollered for him to meet me outside of the fence for a second while the coaches were wrapping up preparations. I talked to him for about 10 seconds, and the manager, who had been out on the field, walked over to the gate and cut me off in mid-sentence to tell him to get back on the field. Then he shut the gate right in front of me without saying a word.

I don't think the coaches handled this properly (it sounds like they and their wives are a bunch of nut cases). However.... As a head coach it is really frustrating when a kid is distracted or pulled aside by a parent or relative trying to coach them when I am there doing the same. I've never had another coach do it, but I think it would be just as frustrating/irritating.

I have found myself wanting to give advice to "my" players when being coached by another person, whether it be all-stars or their travel team or whatever. I find its best I hold my opinions until after the game so I'm not stepping on any toes.

I think you are in a crazy situation and wouldn't want to go through it myself and can't imagine how I would react with all the negativity you've seen - but I think some of your actions you've stated could come off as being confrontational or at least, trying to be a thorn in those other coaches' sides.

I guess I have just one question. I'm a really honest guy. Sometimes to a fault. I'll have 2-3 kids in the draft who aren't very talented but are "my" kids. I've coached them 3-4 seasons. Since I can't protect them, I should I let the other coaches know that I'd like to have them and hope they're understanding? I'm not sure I can tell a kid to skip or bomb an evaluation/tryout. But I know that's how some other coaches get around that sort of thing.

I'm glad to hear you are moving to a new league and they understand why you are leaving. I would be honest with the other coaches and let the chips fall where they may. I would never try to sandbag tryouts (tell the kid to skip or bomb tryouts). I think its important we show them a good example of being honest people even if the outcome doesn't turn out in our favor (i.e. the player does well in tryouts and is selected by another coach).

If you tell the new coaches that you've had these players before and would like to select them in your first rounds to keep the core, I'm sure, as long as they aren't super studs, most of the other coaches will let you so they can select the players they want with no worry of you picking theirs. I would be careful how you handle this being the new coach. You don't want to come from a bad league and then do things that reflect what was done in that league, with your new league.

Good luck!

[HeinekenMan]

I don't think the coaches handled this properly (it sounds like they and their wives are a bunch of nut cases). However.... As a head coach it is really frustrating when a kid is distracted or pulled aside by a parent or relative trying to coach them when I am there doing the same. I've never had another coach do it, but I think it would be just as frustrating/irritating.

I have found myself wanting to give advice to "my" players when being coached by another person, whether it be all-stars or their travel team or whatever. I find its best I hold my opinions until after the game so I'm not stepping on any toes.

I think you are in a crazy situation and wouldn't want to go through it myself and can't imagine how I would react with all the negativity you've seen - but I think some of your actions you've stated could come off as being confrontational or at least, trying to be a thorn in those other coaches' sides.



I'm glad to hear you are moving to a new league and they understand why you are leaving. I would be honest with the other coaches and let the chips fall where they may. I would never try to sandbag tryouts (tell the kid to skip or bomb tryouts). I think its important we show them a good example of being honest people even if the outcome doesn't turn out in our favor (i.e. the player does well in tryouts and is selected by another coach).

If you tell the new coaches that you've had these players before and would like to select them in your first rounds to keep the core, I'm sure, as long as they aren't super studs, most of the other coaches will let you so they can select the players they want with no worry of you picking theirs. I would be careful how you handle this being the new coach. You don't want to come from a bad league and then do things that reflect what was done in that league, with your new league.

Good luck!

Thanks for the advice. I got another call last night from yet another parent who wants to find another place for her son to play. She said the all star coaches didn't provide instruction and did too much screaming at the kids. The thing is that the parents who have contacted me didn't have kids on my team. Their kids were on the other coaches' teams. It does give me some reassurance that I was doing things mostly the right way.

[real green]

HM,
Don't forget there will be kids still playing in the league you're leaving. Strip them of everything and they will be left with nothing. I think it's fine that you have made a choice to switch over but wonder about the motives of bringing others with you. Why not just step down and move over to the other league?

[Bolts-Baseball]

I honestly couldn't get through the entire story... It seems that you're either a glutton for punishment, a martyr, or can really take a punch... I can't tell which. What I can tell you is that it all seemed very stressful, and I can guarantee a few years from now (or sooner) you'll be asking yourself' "Why did I waste all that time and energy?"

What are you doing this for? You or your kid...? In the end, you should be thinking of YOUR kid first and foremost, and HIS development...

Here is complete honesty... Very little to nothing your kid will do on the small youth field will matter when transferring to the high school/college field. If he's got a competitive nature and knows the game with proper offensive and defensive fundamentals, he will be fine... The few things that can be beneficial to a player that plays travel ball is getting the early experience of the routine of tournament play, or being coached early by a highly experienced coach (MLB, NCAA experience only sorry Dads, you may 'know' the game, but you don't know as much as these guys - PERIOD) that can instill confidence... My son played on some of the highest ranked teams in the nation according to USSSA rankings and TravelBallSelect.com, it was a great experience, but in retrospect unnecessary, and had very little influence in the player he is today. In the end, there is NO replacement for talent, size, strength, reps, determination, commitment and passion. If he's good enough, THEY WILL find him, and HE WILL PLAY!!

Good luck!

[Jake Patterson]

I honestly couldn't get through the entire story... It seems that you're either a glutton for punishment, a martyr, or can really take a punch... I can't tell which. What I can tell you is that it all seemed very stressful, and I can guarantee a few years from now (or sooner) you'll be asking yourself' "Why did I waste all that time and energy?"

What are you doing this for? You or your kid...? In the end, you should be thinking of YOUR kid first and foremost, and HIS development...

Here is complete honesty... Very little to nothing your kid will do on the small youth field will matter when transferring to the high school/college field. If he's got a competitive nature and knows the game with proper offensive and defensive fundamentals, he will be fine... The few things that can be beneficial to a player that plays travel ball is getting the early experience of the routine of tournament play, or being coached early by a highly experienced coach (MLB, NCAA experience only sorry Dads, you may 'know' the game, but you don't know as much as these guys - PERIOD) that can instill confidence... My son played on some of the highest ranked teams in the nation according to USSSA rankings and TravelBallSelect.com, it was a great experience, but in retrospect unnecessary, and had very little influence in the player he is today. In the end, there is NO replacement for talent, size, strength, reps, determination, commitment and passion. If he's good enough, THEY WILL find him, and HE WILL PLAY!!
Good luck!

Bolts,
Great post...

I wish I could find the magic formula that would allow dads to accept the advise of those who have made the journey.


"We'd be wise to listen to the old man, for he has walked the path on which we are about to step."