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It disgusts me how there is so much discrimination against imaginary baseball players in the world today. If we only gave them the chance to play, then we could really see just how great they are - but imaginary players aren't allowed to play professionally, or at all, even. Sure, sometimes during pickup games, we allow a "ghost runner" to take our spot so we can go to bat again (and they normally do very well, by the way) but in the pros such things are not allowed. Why? It's pure segregation, that's why.
That is why I'm calling on all of you, my brethren, to boycott baseball from the 1871-∞ era. The fact that baseball players so much as step on a baseball field without even thinking of imaginary players makes them disgusting, racist, bigoted, reprobate, miscreant heathens, not even deserving of the time of day.
I invented the Sidd Finch Movement because we shouldn't deify these bigots! We should shun them, every last one of them. In fact, we shouldn't stop there. We should erase every last trace of them from the history books, so it seems like they never even existed!
The Sidd Finch Movement lives! Power to the imaginary players, power to them all!
That is why I'm calling on all of you, my brethren, to boycott baseball from the 1871-∞ era. The fact that baseball players so much as step on a baseball field without even thinking of imaginary players makes them disgusting, racist, bigoted, reprobate, miscreant heathens, not even deserving of the time of day.
I invented the Sidd Finch Movement because we shouldn't deify these bigots! We should shun them, every last one of them. In fact, we shouldn't stop there. We should erase every last trace of them from the history books, so it seems like they never even existed!
The Sidd Finch Movement lives! Power to the imaginary players, power to them all!
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